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“Bush in the Pursuit of the Islamic Messiah”
Kamangir | August 15, 2007 | Category Humour, Iran, Islam, Islamic Republic
Farda News reports that George W. Bush has had a meeting with a group of American Muslims three weeks ago. In that meeting, he has learned about the Islamic Messiah, Imam Mahdi. Reportedly, CIA has set up a group of elite American Muslims to advise him on the issues regarding Mehdi. In that meeting, he has stated, “This Mehdi must be something very important that Muslims are willing to be killed for him”. According to Farda News, Dick Cheney is against this team [Persian].
A while ago, Ahmadinejad stated, “Thy have completed their file on him [Mehdi]. They are only looking for the address to go kill him. There are foreigners in Tehran who inquire believers about his residence to disrupt [his fight against world powers and the establishment of] Allah’s just government” [Persian].
Muslims believe that Mehdi is living amongst us and that some have the privilege to communicate with him. He will eventually rise against all world powers and will establish Allah’s rule. The Islamic Republic claims to be the preparation for Mehdi’s revolt.
Update: Need more fun with the Islamic Republic? Read this: A Lonely Birthday for a Terrorist Organization (IRGC)
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iran: Bush, CIA to Assassinate Messiah!!…
News reports out of Iran are saying that the Shia Muslim “messiah” (the Mahdi) is being hunted down by the CIA on orders from George Bush. I guess that makes Bush the anti-Christ? I knew it! Hat tip: Brian……
[...] The new Revolutionary Guard sanctions were just a smokescreen. They took the Tancredo strategy and ran with it. The bastards. The magnificent, messiah-killing bastards. [...]
[...] Clark Contact the Webmaster Link to Article dick cheney Bush in the Pursuit of the Islamic Messiah » Posted at Kamangir [...]
Bah, the CIA are crap at killing people. The Mossad, now, have a long list of escaped Nazis and terrorist leaders on their assassinated people list. This insane and somewhat pathetic conspiracy theory ought really be transferred to us Jews. At least it’d make *some* sense then.
Yep, Farda News figured it out. Guess Bush will have to go with Plan B, which was discovered by PakTribune News last week: Bush is planning to bomb Mecca and Medina.
I agree with Roman, and expand his assertion to include the PakTribune story. These conspiracies should be attributed to the Mossad for better realism.
Nuh-uh, Phil, the PakTribune conspiracy theory works best with the US, as the US used nuclear arms during WWII. Israel doesn’t even publicly admit that it has nuclear arms.
No kidding, how many US Presidents has Fidel outlived despite repeated attempts to kill the commie SOB? I mean, we can’t even buy off Osama’s guards in Riyadh to let the batteries run out on his dialysis machine…why would we expect the CIA to be able to pick off a six foot tall, crippled, left-handed Saudi standing on top of a mountain?
My money is on Mossad, they’re awesome! Maybe this messiah they’re waiting for will be the antichrist. If he makes fake peace with Israel, which would be a miracle, Muslims at peace with Jews, that would be a sure sign not to trust him.
Nachtwache, before the rise of Arabism as a nationalist ideology, and the fairly recent rise of Islamism, Jews had few problems with Muslims. Much fewer than they had with, say, Christians and nationalist Europeans. Jews often lived as second-class citizens in Muslim countries, but their rights were generally respected.
The reality today is different. Arab countries expelled their Jews. Many Muslims view Jews in the same manner the Christians of the middle-ages did.
But who knows what tomorrow may bring?
All of us united against China =)
Most likely the Mahdi is living in a basement in Dearborn, Illinois. No wonder the CIA can’t find him.
The CIA should level with Ahmadimajerk, either stop building your nukes, or we will shoot the Mahdi. Time to take the gloves off.
Nachtwache, before the rise of Arabism as a nationalist ideology, and the fairly recent rise of Islamism, Jews had few problems with Muslims. Much fewer than they had with, say, Christians and nationalist Europeans. Jews often lived as second-class citizens in Muslim countries, but their rights were generally respected.
The reality today is different. Arab countries expelled their Jews. Many Muslims view Jews in the same manner the Christians of the middle-ages did.
Very well said, Roman. I guess creation of state of Israel played a part in that change of heart, didn’t? :) Of course, no doubt that corrupt Muslim rulers used and use Israel as a scapegoat for their failures.
But who knows what tomorrow may bring?
Not hard to foresee further downward spiral if Israel attacks Iran’s nuclear facilities, especially if it does it alone…
Rebecca, don’t you mean Dearborn, Michigan?
I am the Mahdi. I am here. I am the One for whom my muslims have waited. When I am ready, I will lead my muslims into the final battle. And I will rule the world from the Peacock Throne in Golestan Palace.
Bikhaanimoon, the creation of Israel played a part, certainly. It gave the young Arab states a unifying factor, a way of restoring the honor (read:pride) lost due to the Colonialist era.
If not Israel, another would have been chosen. Most likely Iran, I suspect. But history went down its current path.
As for Israel attacking Iranian nuclear facilities, at this point it may make Israel more *popular* in the eyes of Arabs. Iranian nuclear arms are scaring the Arab state leaders.
I will add though, that Iran’s nuclear facilities are not Saddam’s lone, unfinished reactor. They’re numerous, widespread, camoflauged, and often underground. Israel is likely to simply be unable to execute such a military operation at all on its own. Hell, just the number of pilots required for a simultaneous strike…
Roman, also note the other logistical issues of getting bombers over to Iran and back to Israel. For the nuclear facilities that are buried, any strike would require heavy duty bunker busters but would likely not leave enough payload capacity for fuel for a return trip to Israel. Now if the aircraft were dumped as the sites were bombed, a Special Forces team might be able to extract the pilots after they eject. However, unlike Osirak, the sites are multiple which leaves the possibility that unknown sites will remain operational. The other issue is that an Israeli first strike would be considered an act of war and would legitimize any direct attack by the IR on Israel.
Any thoughts on the terrorist designation for the IRGC–two years military service is compulsory in Iran for all men. Is this an attempt to not only undercut the Guard’s extensive dominance of business within the IR but limiting its dealings internationally with European and East Asian financial institutions, but also to spur massive demonstrations of civil disobedience by all military aged men…? (you can see perhaps that I think it indeed is :) )
On another note, wasn’t Islam spread through colonization? And we’re not talking 7th century AD here. How about Ottoman inroads into Byzantine Greece in the late 15th century? When the Turks return to the steppes of Asia and return Occupied Eastern Greece (I refuse to recognize Turkey and Istanbul as legitmate entities, let alone Macedonia and Albania) to Athens then we can talk. :)
Right but beside pride and a unifying enemy, I’d add genuine sense of injustice and powerlessness too. Being raised in Iran, I’ve seen first hand how the sense of injustice, even originated genuinely, could turn to a monster among less educated people after a while.
Regardless of feasibility of Israel doing it alone, I see Israel’s participation leading to disaster. The Iranian public have been on sidelines of Arab-Israeli conflict and I.R. has failed so far to rally the public on that. I’m afraid Israeli involvement could change that towards hostility; and its long-term fallout looks grim even if it doesn’t escalate beyond a one-time strike. An off-hand approach as the first gulf war would be more in Israel’s longterm interests.
Ya, Arab leader’s are scared but Ahmadinejad went to extra length with his anti-Israeli rhetoric to rally the Arab street and make it difficult for their leaders to side with US.
BTW, do you really think that I.R. would ever think of nuking Israel or passing a bomb to Hezbollah?
More like a sense of shame and loss of face than injustice, really. It’s not like anyone cared about the Palestinians, as any look at the eternal refugee camps will show. If not for that sense of dishonor, and the repeated attempts to erase that percieved dishonor, this conflict would have ended by now.
And yeah, I see your point about an attack turning the Iranian public against Israel.
As for the nuclear arms, the answer to your question is “Highly unlikely, but not impossible.” It depends on how much worse Iranian presidents can get, how much more powerful the most die-hard clerics become, and on how close Hezb is to a full-scale revolution.
My guess? Should Hezb declare an independent state, Iran may use it as a nuclear missile base, in the same manner the Soviets wanted to do with Cuba.
Roman
Why Hezb should declare an independent state? It will be enough for Hezb to have majority in Lebanese parliament then they can do what they want. It seems that with Siniora and people in March 14 doing nothing at the moment, some generals (Suleiman) in Lebanese army talking about presidency and siding with Hezbullah, this kind of scenario is not far fetched.
Ella, simply because Hezb’s true end goal, no matter how well it tries to hide now that it’s political, is a state like Iran. Imagine how likely the non-Shi’a of Lebanon will like that. The weapons never did leave the hands of the populace after the civil war officially ended, they were just… put away for a rainy day.
If not for that sense of dishonor, and the repeated attempts to erase [...]
Your argument for sense of dishonor, which I agree it played a part, could be referred to other Arab countries but how about the Palestinians themselves? It can’t be just sense of dishonor when you’re expelled from what you considered home for long time, right?
I see a bit of reductionism in the “dishonor” argument. I recall similar sentiments expressed by some Iranians during Iran/Iraq war. I guess it is an aftermath of any long and bloody conflict.
And yeah, I see your point about an attack turning the Iranian public against Israel.
I also think Israel still takes too many fights as a survival fight while it has passed behind the survival issue for sometime. It results in missing opportunities when a real partner arises, like the case with Abbas. Don’t Israelis often blame Palestinians for missing opportunities? :)
It depends on how much worse Iranian presidents can get, how much more powerful the most die-hard clerics become, and on how close Hezb is to a full-scale revolution.
Don’t forget that the president has little say on major foreign issues. I’ll be more worried when the leader dies; it’ll be extremely unlikely that an idealogical one replaces him though.
My guess? Should Hezb declare an independent state, Iran may use it as a nuclear missile base, in the same manner the Soviets wanted to do with Cuba.
Sounds a nice scenario, but too fictional :) Reiterating my earlier point: don’t you think Israel’s heavy-handed response last summer and also the too lengthy occupation of southern Lebanon had “a part” in rise of Hezb? (note the quotations; I’m not blaming it all on Israel!)
ok, I think we’re diverging in too many directions in this post but please come up with your rebuttals. I’ll take you on them in the next posts!
The last part of your reply didn’t load on mobile (no idea why), so I’ll reply to what came before that.
Yes, the Palestinians are a matter of a sense of injustice, or at least it was a big factor. The rest of the much larger Arab street is a different matter though, and I was talking about that rather than the Palestinians in particular.
About us seeing many matters as existential while they’re not, I agree up to a point. This is the middle-east, after all. Nothing is certain, or eternal.
Right, now that I see the reply in its entirety, I’d like to add more to my own.
About Abbas, yes, Israelis very much like to blame Palestinians for missing opportunities. The late Abba Eban, the somewhat mythological foreign minister of Israel, coined the phrase “The Palestinians never miss an opportunity to miss an opportunity.”
Abbas, though, is someone we *do* view as a potential peace partner. The problem is, even the Fatah’s own armed militiamen view him as a joke, and the Fatah itself seems to be falling apart. During the rise of the Hamas, Abbas was totally irrelevant. He knew that, we knew that, everyone knew that. Now that Hamas and Fatah are two somewhat separate entities, there’s something to talk about, but when people in Israel see a gesture of ours (general amnesty to over 200 Fatah gunmen) reduced to a laughing stock by a hundred of them (the condition was that they give up their arms to the Palestinian Authority. This didn’t happen.)
Whereas Hamas *is* asserting its power as a sole sovereign in Gaza, albeit by beating everyone else into submission. And Hamas has no interest whatsoever in dialog with Israel. It goes against their core Islamist ideology. At best they’ll sign a Hudna for a while.
The situation is more complicated than it first appears, you’ll agree. Abbas is a very weak leader, from a very weak party that has just about killed itself with corruption.
About Iranian presidents, you have a very good point, yet on the other hand the presidents of Iran are merely a reflection of those who let them into the race. Or “race” rather, if you will. Ahmadinejad is as good an indication as any that the higher-up clerics of Iran are getting insaner by the year. Eventually, the Supreme Leader may very well become one of these more insane clerics. And man, if that Supreme Leader has nuclear arms at his disposal, I’d be very afraid!
About Hezb, ask Lebanese. The scenario of Hezb splitting the country isn’t as unlikely as imaginary as you may think. It may be speculative, but it isn’t simply a matter of throwing arguments into the air. Regarding Israel’s actions playing a part in Hezb’s rise, I agree, we made a terrible mess in Lebanon after the PLO was kicked out. I have no idea who thought of getting into the local politics to try and get a comprehensive agreement with a country in the middle of a civil war, but someone did. The end result: Israel basically became another faction in the Lebanese civil war. This gave Hezb an outside enemy to focus the (often justified) ire of the Southern Lebanese, though not all of them saw things that way. The SLA was first and foremost South Lebanese Shi’a, and it was allied with Israel.
But to cut a long story short, once Arafat was out of Lebanon we had absolutely no idea what we were doing there or what we were getting into, beyond short-term security reasons. Israeli policies ended up strengthening Hezbollah even further in the withdrawal of 2000, as the withdrawal was conducted in a matter that was basically running away and leaving the SLA behind to die. This didn’t leave those of the SLA loyalists who stayed in Lebanon all too happy, and many of them joined Hezbollah simply for revenge.
On the heavy-handed response in the summer war I disagree, it was not heavy handed. It was disjointed and horribly mismanaged, but not heavy handed. Not for a country that had to endure cross-border attacks from a non-governmental illegal militia since the year 2000, from which point onwards that aforementioned militia had no casus-belli whatsoever. Israel withdrew to the internationally agreed border. Hezb decided Lebanon was a bit bigger than it was before.
But the war itself, as it was conducted, *did* strengthen Hezb. Or rather, it weakened the entirety of Lebanon too much so that it could not handle even the war-battered Hezb.
But Israel did not create Hezb, as I’m sure you’ll agree. Israel was merely a catalyst which it used to grow. The seeds were planted by another.
[...] Related: “Bush in the Pursuit of the Islamic Messiah†[...]
soon we will hear the news of jesus’ coming with quran.
Nations all over the world are searching for Mehdi, he came and passed away and his community and believers are continously working and spreading peace,love and brotherhood without bloodshed or war. Governments dont have that eye to see them. They are here within us. In every country of this world.
Muslims are waiting and I am telling all the Muslim nations and all the religion of the world, you and your generations will be waiting for Mehdi forever.
Try to see and search with your open mind and eyes. You will find his believers/community in your own country.
Saudis or Iranian Government are not the true believers. They are trying to pretend that they are the real Islamic States, everyone knew how they are.
LOVE FOR ALL HATRED FOR NONE.
Is it not possible that this mahdi character is the messiah being waited on by jews and muslims? The miraculous age which is ushered in with the dawning of this messiah certainly implies this. The Mahdi is directly descended from not only Muhammad but also of Abraham. In an area dominated by arabs, it only seems rational that a man from the dominant group brings peace, security and the establihment of a zionist free jewish state. Furthermore the Jesus is a jew who most likely will want to live in the jewish homeland once he returns. I think what modern day people forget is that Jesus, Moses, and Muhammad are all descendants of Abraham, hence this abrahamic extended family (which is responsible for spreading monotheism) is not as distant in belief as the whole world lets on. I think what we’ll see in the time of the Mahdi is the establishment of true monotheism, a move to remove all the falsities that have been added into religions to intially erode the message of monotheism and then to further splinter the groups (e.g. different form of chritianity and islam) for money and power. The messages and practices of jews, muslims and gnostics will remain expect for the cultural additions that have been added over time.